F.U.R.R.I.E.S Act could stand to persecute Texas school D&D and LARP groups, in attempts to weed out "any non-human behavior"

Texas Representative Stan Gerdes presented a piece of prospective legislation, known as the Forbidding Unlawful Representation of Roleplaying in Education (F.U.R.R.I.E.S) Act, to the Texas House of Representatives on March 13. While aimed at schoolchildren who engage in “Barking, meowing, hissing, or other animal noises that are not human speech; and licking oneself or others for the purpose of grooming or maintainance,” the wording of the act means it has the potential to target Texan childrens’ beloved D&D and LARPing groups, since the hobbies involve roleplaying and displays of “non-human behaviour.”

The F.U.R.R.I.E.S Act seeks to weed out “any non-human behavior by a student, including presenting himself or herself [ah, yes, the two genders] on days other than exempt days, as anything other than a human being.” There are some specific exemptions listed, such as Halloween and school mascots – many of which are animals meant to do animal things by way of cheering and promoting varsity (and junior varsity) sports teams. There are no exemptions, however, when it comes to free self-expression, roleplay-based gamification within the curriculum, or the tabletop RPG pastime as a whole.

It’s the “anything other than a human being” part that could cause some real issues as Dungeons & Dragons is highly likely to fall into that category, with only a single playable species being human.

Imagine being forced to play a D&D campaign where everyone played a human and only interacted with other humans. It’s every Dungeon Master’s worst nightmare. Seriously people, THINK OF THE CHILDREN!

Monster Manual art showing pirates pushing one off the plank

(Image credit: Wizards of the Coast)

The F.U.R.R.I.E.S Act appears to have stemmed from unfounded rumors that litterboxes were being installed in school bathrooms due to an influx of children identifying as anthropomorphic animals. For long-time D&D players, this will undoubtedly bring back memories of the unsubstantiated Satanic Panic of the ’80s, which revolved around Dungeons & Dragons being marked as an ungodly hobby that drew children into a world of rituals, witchcraft, and the like.

Included in the list of items that would be prohibited from being used in a “personal or outward display” by the act are tails, animal-like ears, leashes, collars, and “other accessories designed for pets,” as well as any kind of fur, “other than naturally occurring human hair or a wig made to look like human hair”.

The act stands to persecute not only children who present themselves with “physiological features that have not historically been assigned to the homo sapiens species through a means of natural biological development,” but also staff who refuse to enforce the act. Violations could incur fines of $10,000 against the district in question for the first violation, and $25,000 for subsequent missteps.

For more recommendations, why not check out the best board games, or if you’re looking to roleplay without alerting the all-seeing eye, why not try some solo RPGs.

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